Choosing the Hard Route: Learning to Self-Publish as a First-Time Author

When Blaze and the Boiling Point was finally a completed manuscript on my laptop, I didn’t really know what to do next.

I knew I wanted to publish the book. I knew I wanted Blaze out in the world. But how? That part felt huge, intimidating, and completely unknown.

“I Have Nothing to Lose”

Originally, I planned to publish Blaze on my own.

But then a thought crept in - what’s the harm in reaching out to publishers? Not because I thought I’d be accepted. (Quite the opposite, actually!) It was more like a test to myself. So I sent Blaze off with the mindset of, "They’ll probably reject me. and that’s okay. At least I’ll know."

What I didn’t expect was for all 3 publishers I contacted to come back and say yes.

I remember being in complete shock. Real, professional publishing companies wanted to publish my book. Blaze and the Boiling Point was good enough. My writing was good enough. That validation hit deeply!

It wasn’t just my mum, my husband, or my handful of friends believing in me anymore 😂 Other people could see the value too.

And yet… something didn’t sit right.

When “Yes” Comes With a Cost

All three offers were hybrid publishing contracts.

That meant:

• I would pay thousands of £££ upfront

• I would receive only a small % of royalties

• I would hand over a degree of creative and commercial control 

The more I researched, the more uneasy I felt. Online reviews, forums, other authors' experiences painted a picture that wasn’t as shiny as the contracts made it sound. Late (or no) payments. Lack of support. Poor communication. Minimal marketing.

Yes, I’d be involved - but ultimately, the final say wouldn’t be mine. And Blaze felt too personal for that. This wasn’t just a book to me. It was the beginning of a series. A world. Something rooted in my son, my experience, my heart. 

So I said no to all of them.

Scams and More Dead Ends

After turning down the hybrid route, I started looking into self-publishing companies, thinking they might bridge the gap. But instead, I dodged a bullet.

I was offered two contracts from two different companies, within days of each other. Both contracts wanted the full Mood Mates series and they promised me everything in return - bestseller status, marketing, success... for a LOT of money. But that wasn't even the biggest issue. Are you ready for this? 

Both contracts were signed by the same person… with the same low-quality pasted signature... and in each contract, this person had a vastly different job title. And to be clear, the contracts were from DIFFERENT companies. But signed by the same person?

It screamed scam.

At that point, it genuinely felt like Blaze wasn’t meant to exist outside of my laptop. Like every door I knocked on either closed or tried to take advantage of me.

I questioned myself constantly: Am I capable of doing this alone? How will I know what to do? What if I screw up?

Choosing to Do It Anyway

Deciding to do it myself was both the scariest and most liberating choice I made.

In truth, it was what I had planned to do from the start. I just needed to explore the other paths first - to learn, to research, to understand what mattered and what didn’t.

Once I accepted that this would be my responsibility, everything changed. I slowed down. I stopped trying to do all 10 books at once. I focused on doing one book properly.

Choosing My Team and Who to Trust

Finding the perfect illustrator was non-negotiable.

I didn’t want AI. I didn’t want rushed work. I wanted someone who saw Blaze the way I did.

Finding Phillipa on Fiverr was one of the best decisions I’ve made. She’s South African like me, and we just clicked. She didn’t just illustrate Blaze - she understood him. She brought her own creativity while honouring my vision completely.

For printing, I chose to work with the same local company I trust for Thrive products. I didn’t want to commit to thousands of copies overseas. I wanted quality, reliability, and peace of mind.

Every choice was slower. Harder. More expensive upfront in some ways. But every choice felt right.

Showing Up Without Guarantees

Marketing a children’s book as a first-time author is… humbling.

I don’t have a strategist. I don’t have a budget. I don’t have a team doing anything for me. What I do have is TikTok, Instagram (kind of), my website - and a willingness to show up, even when it feels uncomfortable. Because everything you see online is literally all me, and if I'm completely honest, I'm winging it.

Putting something you’ve poured your heart into out into the world is vulnerable. You wonder if it’ll be seen for what it truly is… or if it’ll just get lost among everything else. But I keep going. Because this is my dream.

Where I Am Now

Blaze taught me how to do this.

And as I prepare for Drizzle’s launch, I can already see how much I’ve learned - how much more confident I am, which mistakes I won’t repeat, how my process is evolving. I know I’ll keep learning with every Mood Mate I release. That’s part of the journey.

I don’t know where this will lead. I don’t know how big The Mood Mates will become. But I do know this: I chose the hard route because it felt right. And I’m proud of that choice.

This isn’t the end of the story - it’s the foundation of something much bigger. And I hope you’ll stick around to see where it goes 💜